Lost the combination
Teacher: Where is your homework?

Pupil: I put it in a safe, but lost the combination!

Submitted by: Kay Yogi
Address : Indra Chock
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Boss wants too much
For thirty years, Johnson had arrived at work at 9A.M. on the dot. He had never missed a day and was never late.

Consequently, when on one particular day 9 A.M. passed without Johnson's arrival, it caused a sensation. All work ceased, and the boss himself, looking at his watch and muttering, came out into the corridor.

Finally, precisely at ten, Johnson showed up, clothes dusty and torn, his face scratched and bruised, his glasses bent. He limped painfully to the time clock, punched in, and said, aware that all eyes were upon him, "I tripped and rolled down two flights of stairs in the subway. Nearly killed myself."

And the boss said, "And to roll down two flights of stairs took you a whole hour?"

Submitted by: Anish
Address : White City,London
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Locked Out of Car
Two blondes lock thier keys in the car. One of the blondes tries to break into the car while the the other one watches.

Finally the first blonde says "Darn, I can't get in the car!" The other blond replies, "keep trying, it looks like it is going to rain and the top is down".

Submitted by: Riza Mirza
Address : Putney
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Smoking and Heaven
Jay: Does the Bible say that if you smoke you can't get to heaven?

Ted: No, but the more you smoke the quicker you'll get there.

Submitted by: Rishi Malakar
Address : Basantapur, Nepal
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Why must we learn this?
One day professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept. A pre-med student rudely interrupted to ask, "Why do we have to learn this pointless information"

"To save lives." the professor responded quickly and continued the lecture.

A few minutes later, the same student spoke up again. "So how does physics save lives?" he persisted.

"It keeps the ignoramuses like you out of medical school," replied the professor

Submitted by: Rupesh
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